Coming Out

I just "came out" to some of my friends last February. It was the campaign season and one of my gay friends out of the blue asked me, in front of our other friends, whether I was straight. With a slight hesitation, "No. I know you've always known, you just needed the confirmation," I said. But it was not the case for a few, one of my closest friends was surprised, she and I were tagged as an item in the past. Few days after, campaign was already over, I decided to reveal this particular secret to my high school friend, the week after, to another. And just last Wednesday, to my co-officers in one of my orgs.

It was the perfect time to come out.
I am already at the right age. I already had the courage to do so. It was the time of my life when boxing myself to whoever I pretend to be just adds to my inherently sad self.
I am with the right people. They understood. Some were shocked, but no one judged me.
I am in UP. Like what I've said to my high school friends, Masaya akong nasa UP ako. Malaya. Mapagpalaya.

Nothing's Going to Be Fine

I am perplexed at how steadfast sadness can be. Just when you thought everything's fine already, here it is, like a water seeping through the tiniest of your soul's crevice, spreading in you with sorrow even you do not know of.

Seesaw

The swings and ironies of emotions again.

One day you lose in the elections but you feel happy because finally you had learned you do not need the position to serve the masses, the next day you are in the birthday party of someone you like but because of some realizations, you end up making excuses and leaving early because you cannot take the blues anymore.

:(

STP

I lost in the student council election, so did majority of my slatemates. The moment our campaign team announced to us the very few who won, all I could remember thinking was blame the students who did not vote for us, who did not see the real picture of what we are striving to put a solution to, to the real condition of not just the college, not just UP, but more importantly, the masa. But I realized it was wrong to do so. It is now my responsibility to prove to people that I, and my whole party, do not need to be in position to serve the studentry and the people. We lost, but we will win the nation.