Mixed Feels

After a long delay I was able to watch UP Repertory Company's LEAN: THE MUSICAL earlier!
The lead cast Mr. Alub is so cute :'( could not contain myself earlier. Stalked him already and found out he's in a relationship. :p

But wait! There's more! After a week of not seeing each other, Ron (will call him this from now on :3) and I finally reunited before the play started. He hugged me and told me he missed me. FUCK how can you not fall for a guy like that?

Midnight Owl

So I found this really cool cozy place in Maginhawa called Midnight Owl, thanks to my equally unproductive-in-own-house friend. I was on my way home from Shaw when I realized the submission for my thesis proposal is only two weeks away and I’ve only started a few revisions. It has been two weeks since my thesis defense and I believe I was only able to do 5% of everything that was advised to me by the panelists.

Back to the study hub, the atmosphere is so relaxing I’m thinking of abandoning my house. The wall colors and lightings are soothing to the eyes, actually everything inside the place. There’s this huge blackboard with the menu and the counter has all these mini blackboard-like notes and cute objects like the tip jar, wake-up forms and free notepad.

When ordering, you have to click the buzz button and suddenly some accommodating girl will appear from the door behind. The menu ranges from teas to shakes to breakfast meals and sandwiches. And with this kind of place, the prices are pretty cheap. Milk teas for around P80, shakes around P60, breakfast meals for P89, and. P80 sandwiches. The most expensive I can see now is their roast beef with mashed potatoes for the price of P179.

Right now, I just ordered banana shake and fries for an economical P108. I won’t discuss the taste since I don’t think it’s their specialty but I must say they are decent.

The playlist is as soothing; right now, it's Coldplay's The Scientist that's playing. 

The other people here are likewise cooperative minimal talking and movements lol. And there's this cute guy at my right. Well I'm not sure if he's cute or it's just because he's the only guy here aside from myself, if you consider me one.

This is getting too long! I need to do finish my drink and resume my thesis. Bye!

Falling in Love After A Long Time

You were fresh out of elementary when you met him, already wearing that smile and smell you could never forget. You could have evaded the feeling if only fate hasn’t messed all things up again. Months later you see yourself with him in the canteen kubo, with four more boys, starting to build relationships, some of which will eventually last until now. You were with him during lunchbreaks, weekend bonding with the barkada, and afterschool gimmicks. You were there when they left him, when it was only you who could understand. No malice, no hopes, just pure and true concern for a friend.

Boys will be boys, and so you acted the stereotypes. You met a girl and thought it was love. In your heart, you wished it was true. So you would never have to explain, so you would never have to lie. But you cannot fool love, and so it never came. And you were back to him, happy.

 Years after, like many great friendships, it turned into love, unknown to him, unrequited in your part. How ironic the moment that followed was: he confessing his love, not to you, but to someone else. Rubbing salt into the wound, it was your bestfriend. And you could not contain it. You cried  and people around thought it was the unreciprocated romantic love from your bestfriend. That’s what you told them, anyway, that you fell for her. Another pretension, another sidetracking.

And then it was gone, unknown to you why. The unparalleled friendship between you and him. Not the love, though, not when it was just starting to escalate. It was worse. Years of togetherness, now all you could do was stare. Good thing the universe sided with you finally that time. It was your last year in high school. And you were off to running away.

Romantic love was absent in the first years of college. Getting into the university, you could not dare think of it. You were too occupied with academics and organization works. But sometimes you just cannot stop thinking of a future with someone, especially seeing those around you. You were satisfied, nevertheless.

A year before graduation, you decided to run for student office. You met new friends and then it just happened. You came out of the closet. Expressing yourself was much easier. The movements were not calculated anymore, the language now negligible. Your college friends noticed how happy and freer you have become. You are already able to share more, crushes, kilig moments, booooooooys.

And then this guy. You have known him for a long time already but it was just recently when the feelings came rushing. You flirted with him, jokingly. You were always the clown so it was harmless. Even the people around did not see malice, they thought it was just another of your comic acts.

Trouble commenced when jokes began becoming truths, truths into longing, and longing to dreaming. Even if you know you have no chance on a straight goodlooking smart guy. Yes, you are falling in love again.

Ganda ko. He was the one hugging. :3

I Love You Because...

I love your confidence.

I love how you’re not bothered at what others say about you: that you’re too proud, or too snobbish.

I love how self-assurance oozes out of you.

I love your intelligence.

I love how you’re both street- and booksmart.

I love it when you deliver speech and leave everyone listening.

I love your laugh.

I love hearing your infectious giggle. More so when I’m the reason behind it.

I love it when you let out that unique hahaha. When you make me feel like everything’s alright.

I love your fashion.

I love how you don’t care about how you look.

I love it when your polo matches your topsiders as much as when your rubber shoes don’t fit your pants.

I love it when you look casual, average, or sleek.

I love your body.

I loved it the first time I saw it. I still do until now.

I love how it has no bulges of muscles and no trace of fat.

I love how you don’t work for your figure yet remain gorgeous. At least for me.

I love your principles.

I love how you wear it and show it to the world, unfazed.

I love your commitment for change.

I love how you fight for them, for us.

I love your photos.

I love your craving for sharing the unseen, the instants of life only you can capture. Those that speak of poverty and struggle, those that converse of bliss and freedom.

I love your taste for subjects, away from the comforts of the conventional, from the dictates of availability.

I love how you hug me at random moments.

I love your arms around me. When for no reason you embrace me from behind and rest your chin on my shoulder.

I love you.

But I hate you for not knowing it.

Week Update

Saturday. We went on a field trip and visited shrines in nearby provinces. While the itinerary was not very memorable, the travel and bus ride were.

Sunday. From the field trip, I went straight to our organization’s induction for applicants. Having barely enough sleep, I gave up and got some nap the last part of the final rites still ongoing. When I woke up, applicants were already members. On our way home, my orgmate treated us breakfast for her nearing birthday. Slept the entire afternoon and started my thesis presentation afterwards. Got so emotional with how unprepared I was and readied myself to fail the defense and have a semester-extension in college.

Monday. With just 2 hours of sleep, I went straight to school to prepare. Fast forward to the result, I was not expecting everything that happened: the panelists’ gentle mood, the minor comments, and  the terror professor’s statement “Your study has a promise”. I swear to God I almost cried in front them hearing I can pursue my topic and be then eligible for graduation next year.

Tuesday. No moment stood out except for the 4-hour travel I had going home to my province caused by the torrential rain, heavy traffic, and jeepney strike. When I finally reached home, I immediately checked my SNS and it was a tweet that made my day, even my week. The guy I was talking about in my previous post told me he loves me. :p Not the romantic type, though. But it’s better than no love from him at all. Hate it when he does things that make me fall for him even more. Hahahaha landith.

Wednesday. I wasn’t able to go to class after I had my occasional lazy bones. I instead went out with my friends and attended church right after.