Choosy

Because it’s not always what they call writer’s block. Sometimes it’s the stories themselves that elude you. Deeming others as more worthy of their fosterage. Having long learned to refrain from committing the blunders of their ascendants. Thinking they are better off with a finer weaver of words.

Signal Warning

Because you are the cold that sent tingles up my spine, the lightning strikes that kept me up at night, the dampness that made me uneasy yet always wanting, the thunder claps that woke me up from my reverie, the winds that shied away the remnants of my yesterdays,


and the raindrops that made it all real.

19

A year ago, I ranted over how rudderless my life has been. I’m turning 19 a few minutes from now and some things, sadly for me, have not changed. I am still a tumbleweed being tossed and driven by the ever sadistic winds. I know, I know. Still too young to go through a quarter-life crisis (if that’s what you call this).

My family is functional. Several sets of friends stay by my side. Wealth and health has never been an issue to me. I was lucky enough to be in my dream university. I just have one enemy. Only one being hates me. In short, all is well.

But there’s just something that has kept and still keeps me from being completely happy. The truth is, I don’t understand. I laugh a lot, I know I make a lot of people happy, and as I’ve said, my conscience is clear from having hurt other people, but a part of me is still wistful. Longing for something. Or someone.

Haaay, for now, I’ll just wish my self an advanced happy birthday. And I promise, 19-year old self, that now will be the last year you’ll feel that way. That before I step into the 20-year mark, I’ll be completely happy and content and kickin! Sana din magaling ka na magsulat pagdating nu’n! :)

My Cold Weather Playlist

“It’s been a long night in New York City, it’s been a long night in Baton Rouge, I don’t remember you looking any better.”


“And if you want love, swim in a deep sea, take all your big plans, this is bound to be a while “


“Half of my heart’s got a grip on the situation, half of my heart takes time, half of my heart’s got a right mind to tell you that I can’t keep loving you.”


“Clouds of sulfur in the air, bombs are falling everywhere, it’s heartbreak warfare.”


“And out of all these things I’ve done, I think I love you better now.”


“Something in your eyes, makes me wanna lose myself, makes me wanna lose myself, in your arms.”


“You whisper “come on over” ‘cause you’re two drinks in, but in the morning, I will say goodbye again, think we’ll never fall into the jealous game?”


“But you didn’t have to cut me off, make it like it never happened and that we were nothing.”


“Nothing to do, nowhere to be, a simple little kind of free, nothing to do, no one but me, and that’s all I need.”


“Don’t say a word, just come over and lie here with me, ‘cause I’m just about to set fire to everything I see.”


“You want to stay with me in the morning, you only hold me when I sleep, I was meant to tread the water, now I’ve gotten in too deep “


“You don’t know me, and you don’t even care, and you said, you don’t know me, and you don’t wear my chains.”

Random Thought After an All-Nighter

So here’s the soporific version of the drunk post.

It’s really a small small world. I chanced upon here in Tumblr a guy from the university, from the same college, who is also a body-mate. And I backread his posts and found out he’s in a relationship with Y, but then I should have used “used to be” ‘cos they’re not together now but I just found out about it a little earlier that’s why I did not. Well, I didn’t have a clue they were partners inasmuch as I haven’t seen them together even once. But then If I’ve seen them together, it wouldn’t make a difference because not all pairs you see are couples. But you see, couples have this aura that shouts they are in a relationship. So if I’ve seen them together, maybe I would not have been as dumbfounded as I was minutes ago. But then again, if I haven’t been surprised then this post would be non-existent. So thank God, it’s a small small world.

Haha, whatever. I just wanna sleep right now. But I shouldn’t. :<

Journotlism

Supposed to be my first journalistic piece. But my professor just murdered it with corrections. Why do you not love me, Journ?

Pouring Down

I woke up to someone placing a pillow under my head which was leaning against the car window. It was Dad, attempting to make me feel comfortable knowing the inherently uneasy feel of both my position and the slumbering inside a moving vehicle itself. It was of no use, though, for my somnolence subsided after the sight of one of the few things I find beauty in: raindrops.

In the Meadow

There you were, sitting indian style on the heart of the seemingly boundless meadow.

As I drew nearer, you closed the book positioned on your lap.

“Sensed me?”, my mind asked, but I continued approaching.

I stiffened the moment you turned your head towards me. I noticed the all-familiar curve appearing upon your face, the smile I’ve fallen in love with. So I forced mine.

You nodded at me to draw closer. I did.

As I sat down, I was able to get a whiff of the winds, which smelled of your perfume, “You still have not changed.”

“While you still have not forgotten,” you retorted.

We looked at each other, grinned, and sent out a laugh.

And then the atmosphere grew pensive again. Before I knew it, you were already holding my hand.

It was magic. The scene was picturesque, just like in the movies. Two lovers holding each other’s hand, alone in the heart of the universe.

The gentle winds blowed.

The sky turned red as the sun prepared to set.

The Slogger

While the whole nation was busy commemorating the aluminum death anniversary of Ninoy Aquino, the clan was celebrating his first natal day. If they had known then that he’ll be causing them a good deal, they would have taken part in the former instead.

After eighteen monotonous years, he attempted making sense of life and looking for the direction he so long sought for. Failing after a little less than a thousand tries, he put up with just going with the flow since the universe won’t grant him anything, anyway.

Along with his personality, his confidence got lost in the woods and are yet to find their way back home. He settles for decent and mediocre as frequent as he complains about mankind. He owes his sanity to friends, pessimism, the university, and another set of friends.

Status

To start this off, the current love of my life.